[He tugs Bruno down, lying back on the bed so he can press up even closer to him. That hand in his hair is worth everything, and he pushes against it, his eyes closing.

It's all very well and good, he thinks, to say that Abdul wouldn't want him to torture himself. Bruno's not wrong; he likely wouldn't. It was his decision, no matter that it went contrary to what they'd all agreed outside the mansion. He'd made a choice, just as Iggy had. Just as Kakyoin had. But--]

I thought he was here, when I first came and saw Kakyoin. I thought . . . I don't know. I'm always ready to believe in a miracle.

[He murmurs it against his neck, his eyes closing.]

Same with Sher, when she came back here. I was so ready to believe that it was her, that nothing had gone wrong, that I hadn't-- that she was okay.